Turning the page...

Turning the Page...

It's been quite some time since I've felt the rush to get my thoughts on paper. Not because there was nothing to write about, because I was waiting for the page to turn. I recently have come to the conclusion that you need to stop waiting for things to happen, and start making them happen. I was never the girl growing up to branch out of my shell, or find ways to make things happen for myself. I was a selfless, unconfident girl that had the fear of life. I walked day in and day out with fear that maybe my page would never turn.

Well ladies and gentleman, I'm here to tell you, the page just keeps on turning.

Hardship. A word that many of us fear. The constant fear that maybe we might feel it someday or maybe we'll never get the opportunity to feel it. This life of yours is brought together in pieces and though you may be missing some, keep moving forward. Trust me I know that's easier said than done, I was one that could never keep moving forward. But you learn, and sometimes it has to be the hard way.

Hardship is a way for your brain to help you feel emotion and heal from it. The page may be stuck on a number, but your brain just keeps on moving. Find your happy, you know its out there.

Also yourself to get your inner self a little more love, and a lot less hardship. Learn to follow the path that guides you into success, happiness, and love. Look around you, take a step back and realize the page will turn.

It was years of me being stuck on the same page over and over again. The thoughts that maybe it wasn't the things happening to me that were the problem, it was the person inside of me that was making it happen. It took away the dignity we all look for as a young adult, it pushed me back to a place where the page never changes. I'm now writing this thinking about all the hardship I've ever felt, and laugh thinking that those small mistakes, those small decisions I made would ever shape the life I live now.

That life I chose to live taught me the worst and the best. It taught me that making the bad same decisions over and over again was a way of trying to find self love. That every time I tried to write it down on paper, I felt nothing. Those small mistakes, that small frame of time in my life, will never shape the life I live now. In fact those small mistakes lead me to the best thing that has shaped my life today. My page turned.

It turned because I learned to stop living in the past. To stop feeling sorry for myself. To stop letting 2 years be the definition of how my entire life was going to be shaped. I learned that not only are you foolish for those things, but you're in the best position to make your life right. I believe they call that "rock bottom."

Rock bottom may happen, but turn it around. Turn your page. Rock bottom for me gave me love, inspiration, success, and happiness.

It was a way to pick myself up off my feet, take one day at a time, and find a new chapter that would give me the best life I could have. Never feel like your life is at a stopping point, because one day someone may look at your rock bottom and find a way to sweep you off the rocks.

Love. A strong word many of us fear to say. A word that haunts us of our past and makes us think what it really means. Never did I think that love was going to be the thing that turned my page. Now I sit here and write this thinking how I could ever not believe in love.